If You Want To Go Fast..

If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.

The source of the proverb isn’t certain, but its truth is as old as what it means to be human. Long ago, people relied on their tribes to survive. They relied in real physical ways. There was no way that they could say, “Let’s practice physical distancing.” If they had, they would have died from the reality that life at a distance is no life at all. People require touch. Not the kind of “manufactured touch” that often comes from apparently “trained” professionals.

My grandmother could give a foot massage that I had never received after paying $60 an hour from a professional. I’m sure there are good professionals out there, but I did not encounter one. I did volunteer hand and foot massage in the hospital years ago, and the nurses used to joke, “Oh, you need to do me next!” But I know it was no joke. People need this. The people I had looked after had really appreciated it, and I feel that it helps open the energy channels in the body. And most important, it feels good!

Right now, nature might be teaching us that our “connections” were broken before and that old apparently “normal” was nothing normal at all. People putting money and status before the truly important things in life. Rushing around without any kind of presence of mind. Living to eat instead of eating to live.

connect tree.jpgThe range of troubles that come from lack of connection are coming to their head and I’m sure we all are aware that change needs to happen and it needs to happen now. We are out of time. Individually and collectively, once we get this virus under control, it will not be enough to make permanent change. There will be another and another unless we fix our mental state, which leads to physical ill health as well.

It is believed now that although we don’t “see” the connection in the space between us, it exists and we have an influence on each other even if we don’t know each other. Anyone who knows the phenomenon of quantum entanglement and quantum particles reacting at a distance to one another could understand how this might work between us. See YouTube for many videos for a description of the experiment. Here is one link:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JFozGfxmi8A

If you have young children, you know how difficult it is to orchestrate a trip out. Everyone needs to be washed and fed. Provisions need to be packed for everyone. A plan needs to be in place for needed bathroom and rest breaks. The children need to know where they are going and why. One child might love to read. Another might love to solve puzzles. Another might want to write or observe.

The different desires and needs of everyone needs to be taken into account for a happy and successful outing. And people need to be able to share their experience in a meaningful way with others who will truly listen and care about what they have to say, understanding that what they have to say, is worthy. And this, too, takes time and strategy because a sharing of time and resources and mental and physical stamina must exist along with true mutual responsibility. Not mere lip service or some form of plastic toy that is played with and thrown away very quickly in favour of something else apparently more bright and shiny.

At this time, when people are re-shaping the world, we can take the time to make critical decisions that involve everyone around us in our sphere.connect3.png

We have the opportunity to think ahead and decide to walk through this, planning ahead as best as we can and taking action so that our “trip” together is as easy and fun for everyone involved.

If someone rushes you, tell them to go look at a flower and see that it is in no rush to grow. Tomorrow will come or it won’t. Today is a gift. That’s why they call it a present.

Connectionz Don’t Have To Be Complicated.

They don’t have to be, yet we often make them so. Our actual needs are simple, yet day to day happenings seem to drive us to always want more, even though more often equates to less in the ways that are really important. Life becomes an autonomic event where we do things, but never really pay attention to what we’re doing.

Children want to learn, and will do almost anything if someone is willing to do it with them. Teens want to know that they are seen and heard. Adults want to know that what they do counts for something.

encourage

What better way to demonstrate our ‘Connectionz’ with others than simply by being with them in a casual, easygoing way, you know simple, old-fashioned togetherness. If we try to see the ordinary as extraordinary, when talking with someone and not worrying about who’s right or wrong just being in the moment with them.

Staying awake to what matters most in anothers life. Loving and being loved. Embrace family. Restore people’s faith in humanity. Remember to give your whole heart and your whole mind to those we are with — before it all disappears, whoosh!

For you to give this to another person to make this kind of impact in a lifetime is a special gift, but it takes practice. Some people never, ever grasp this concept. Let this not be your fate. Let this not be the fate of those around and close to you. Let it not be the fate of anyone.

Grab those around you – big or small – look into their faces, show them your eyes, let them see that you care. Give what you can everyday and in every way and you will find that your capacity for that giving grows as you do so. When you give all you are able, you will not regret it. Your only regret may be that you held back, that you didn’t or were unable to have done more.

Team Work

I want to ask my village of friends all around the world, to share with us their favorite ordinary moments… the times when you overjoyed just to do for others… the times when the only thing that really mattered was the connection, your words will be inspirational and wise beyond comprehension.

It’s not about traveling to someplace, about spending huge sums of money or throwing amazing parties. But about the simple things: The best moments are when 
we’re together because the simple things are powerful. Those moments are what make make for the best memories. The ones that we can think about often, those that lift us up.

Please blog with us.

People are People

Regardless of who you are, where you’re from or what you do for a living, people are people and we all want the same basic things. Of course there are physiological differences but putting those aside, we are left with a number of attributes that are prevalent the world over. 

ideas-sWhy otherwise would advertising work so well? It’s well known in marketing circles that if you appeal to certain aspects of human psychology it is far easier to persuade people to your point of view.

I can tell you based on over 25 years of sales experience, this is fundamentally true. Another truth is that our relationships run us. We react and do things based on the people we’re constantly with or want to be with. Cultivation of personal relationships is then what it’s all about.

“You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.” - Dale Carnegie, How to Win Friends and Influence People

Relationships run the world. The most successful can meet almost anyone and build an almost instantaneous relationship. While the rest of us have a difficult time with it, even when we would like to do better. Why is that? A thorough look at anyone who is good at creating relationships will reveal some interesting characteristics, the likes of which can help us all.

A connection is a two way street, it starts as a one way approach, which develops and builds from there. To connect ‘we have to want to give or do for another person’ with ‘no thought for what we may get out of it’. What can I do you? How can I help you? Whenever we meet someone these are the type of thoughts we must keep in mind. If we do, a connection will be close at hand.

reach-sA kind word, a helping hand, along with kind and helping thoughts; these will always work during an approach, from there if we continue to keep the other person in mind with the same kind of thoughts and desires, a connection will just get stronger and stronger. That doesn’t mean everyone will become your friend or that the relationship will grow and expand. It does mean the onus is on each one of us to keep others in mind first and foremost, it doesn’t matter what situation you’re talking about.

For many people this will be quite difficult at first especially those who may have never been nurtured that way, but it gets easier as more effort and frequency is put into it. By keeping others in mind first we slowly become more ‘altruistic’, our EGO (that part of us that is always saying what’s in it for me) decreases and the number of true relationships will increase. You gradually change from a ME first person, to a YOU first person.

Others will begin to look at you as a desirable person to be around, as you become more consistent in your thoughts and deeds and as you treat others as if they are real and important. The more you strive to learn about and be there for others even in simple ways the more memorable person you will become to others.

upwardAs a result your own happiness will also increase, because when we’re with others, we feel more positive, which leads to greater happiness. When we’re happier, we make more connectionz and have better relationships, which in turn makes us more positive and on and on in an “upward spiral”.

Connectionz Are What Matterz !

Fullfillment

we-first

Fullfillment

When we take the path of awareness, we see every situation that we find ourselves in, as beneficial for our development.

We affect one another with our thoughts, qualities, and feelings. Everything is passed from one person to another.

Change for the better depends on us being able to transfer our focus from “me” to “we”.

It is vital that we learn how to connect and cooperate.

Benefiting from Interdependence and Connection

connectedness

 

So often, that it’s difficult to understand how it could be, we hear about groups and individuals within them who care nothing about anything but themselves.  Their egos have virtually taken them over.  The day-to-day life around them is dominated by how can they get others to buy their product(s), use their service(s), how can they can get something out of every situation.  With the obvious end result being they have little regard for whether or not people want or need those items.  Their will to receive (their ego) is so great that their entire existence literally revolves around those egoistic desires.

What can we do to shift this trend?  With our lives being so irreversibly interdependent and interconnected.  It is very easy to look at the current events of any given area of the world and see how the events happening there influence events of our own or other locations.  Our day-to day existence depends on how we interact.

I’m sure you’ve heard of ‘Six Degrees of Separation’ it was first postulated publicly in the 1950’s and later a movie and a play by the same name were made ‘Six Degrees of Separation’.  Basically, everyone is six or fewer steps away, via introduction, from any other person in the world.  We can create a chain of ‘a friend of a friend’ statements that can be used to connect any two people in a maximum of six steps.

I myself find this easy to believe, if you use or are a fan of many of the social networks available on the Internet as I do, I’m sure you will find the same. One of those networks has me connected directly to 136 people and their first, second and third level connections give me access to in excess of 6.7 million others.

Our technological advances especially within the areas of communications and travel allow us to be larger than ourselves, we span greater distances faster and more then at any time in the past.  Our modern world is virtually shrinking each day due to our ever-increasing connectedness.  Despite the sometimes-great physical distances.

Mathematician Manfred Kochen extrapolated the empirical results in a manuscript entitled ‘Contacts and Influences’ in 1973 concluding at that time it was practically certain that in a U.S.A sized population base and structure “any two individuals can contact one another by using at most two intermediaries”.

If we are to actually make this a world that we can all live together on, our day-to-day lives need to be making a similar movement towards a similar goal.  We can accomplish this greater connectedness through bestowal.  Helping someone or something when the help is needed with no thought of compensation or return.

Each time we receive a chance to relate with or to others with greater concern for them than for ourselves we are bestowing our self to them.  A connection is made between souls.  The ending result of bestowal is reception.  We receive a feeling of belonging, although it is a fleeting feeling and does not last long.  Be we can get it back as often as we like by creating bestowal again.

As we move towards this life of bestowal and reception we begin to move internally and externally closer to those we bestow upon.  This then moves us toward the reality of our existence that we are in fact the highest level of life on this planet, and we do not need to take anything for by bestowing we receive everything.

Humanity has little experience operating this way.  We are used to defining ourselves as individuals or members of factions of society, from family to nation-state, the current situations around the world necessitate that we expand our view.  We must become aware of the truth of our interconnectedness if we are to survive and flourish.

Listen – Understand – Reply

Listen – Understand – Reply

To understand someone we have to listen…

“Holy listening – is to listen to another’s soul in life, a condition of disclosure and discovery, may be almost the greatest service that any human being ever performs for another.” ~ Douglas Steere look2

I’m an English speaking person, I know a some words in many languages, none really enough to carry on a full conversation. So when I’ve traveled to non-English countries I’ve found that I must listen to every word that was being spoken to me. I had to watch for non-verbal clues, arm movements, body and sign language even the voice tone and volume level, to capture some part of the meaning or intent of what was being said to me. Traveling really did give me some unforgettable lessons.

Although we may not always know exactly what it is, every person has a reason for what they’re trying to say. Sometimes impatience or distractedness on our part causes us to drift. Often I think it’s just that we are, human beasts… so consumed with our own opinions, that we prejudge what others are trying to say before they’ve finished. And at times even before we have our own clear thoughts about what was or is being said. We aren’t actually trying to do that, but our ego’s take over and we lose our sense of control. Even the best of us!

WordsTo be a better listener… you have to hold another person’s desire to express themselves above and over your own desire to express yourself. If you spend all or most of a conversation concentrating on something else, or even thinking about the next thing you want to say in response, you’re not really listening.

Instead of letting our minds drift in and out or thinking about what to say in response, try to actually focus on the the speaker themselves. Most people unfortunately are easily distracted by thoughts of what they want to say, sometimes they may even be a little exited about a thought they have and want to respond immediately so they don’t forget it. Other times they simply have their own opinion locked and loaded to fire off as soon as there is the slightest break in dialogue. What we must do, is really try to hold off and let the other person finish their thought, then let the response flow naturally and directly from and in response to what they has just said.

The interesting thing is none of us are perfect…we try so hard to appear that way, but we aren’t. Most of the time we just simply miss the point; that we are social beings and learn an immense amount from just being with and listening to others. Recently I read something that sounded very simple yet somewhat profound in regard to listening to people.

To be an active part of an conversation we must:

- Explore, what is being said in terms of the speakers worldidea
- Respond, try to be very clear of what what was said, and respond again in terms of the speakers world
- Encourage, the conversation to be a back and forth flow, for each to understand clearly

Conversations by nature are two way, although there will always be some people who are self-centered and demand more. But that is not the intent of the majority. Most, want to have meaningful conversations, especially with those we care about. We just have little or no experience at doing this. Response thinking we must try and try and try again.

A meaningful conversation is about finding a connection where the potential exists. Often subliminal, but present nonetheless. If someone is talking the time to speak with you, they are trying to make a connection, and it’s more of a privilege than many may comprehend. More than mere words are happening, more than great or grandiose thoughts, we are giving and receiving a portion of life, through the time that we are with them. Honestly there is little else that can even come close to being so valuable a gift.

others

So the true essence of being a great listener then is to appreciate and cherish all the moments that we spend with others, for they will never again return to us. Give others your full attention. If we all try to do this, then we will make the world a better place for all!

Webbingz, Connectionz are what Matterz!

Hello world!

Welcome to Webbingz, this is the first post for us, with many more to come.

The name Webbingz came about from conversations I’ve had with my wife and better half on what to call or describe it when we talk about connecting things together.  We wanted to use something that described connecting but was somewhat more encompassing

We hope you enjoy the web site and come back often as one of our Bloggerz or just to visit and have a look around.

Thanks for stopping by.